Letting Go

I’ve noticed a lot of angst and frustration lurking around recently. May be it’s the failure of modern politics, austerity, or the climate crisis. It could just be the stress of holding ourselves together in modern times. Whatever’s going on, a lot of us are struggling under the pressure.

We experience numerous disappointments each and every day. Our expectations go unmet, our plans are blocked by circumstance, our wishes go unfulfilled, and we discover that our lives are subject to a myriad of forces beyond our conscious control. In some cases, our response is powerful because we must invest ourselves and our resources to overcome genuine hardship. In others, our reactions are far more passionate than our circumstances likely warrant. The tension that permeates our bodies and minds when we are late for an event, interrupted at work, or sitting in traffic is not inappropriate, but it can interfere with our well-being in profound ways. When we stop worrying about relatively unimportant matters, we can be at peace and devote so much more of ourselves to what is truly important. 

The small frustrations and irritations wield such power over us because they rob us of the illusion of control. But every problem is a potential teacher – a confusing situation is an opportunity to practice mindfulness, and difficult people provide us with opportunities to display compassion. There is a natural human tendency to invest copious amounts of emotional energy in dilemmas and frustrations because that’s how the brain is wired, it analyses everything to find a route out of the perceived danger. The problem is that often the issue is emotion-based and there isn’t an escape route. We just have to accept that sometimes we feel upset, angry, or stressed, and trust that these moments will pass, just like all the other times in our lives that we’ve been in a similar situation. When we let go we discover that it’s not really so devastating after all. 

In the stress of a tense incident, differentiating between an inconsequential annoyance and a legitimate challenge can seem a monumental task. Ask yourself whether the emotions you are feeling will be as vivid in a year, a day, or even an hour. As focused as you are on this moment in time, your reward for letting go of your emotional investment may be the very happiness and harmony of being whose loss you are lamenting. Needless aggravation is seldom worth the cost it exacts. You cannot distance yourself from life’s inconsistencies, irritations, and upheavals, but you can relinquish your desire for perfect order and gain peace of mind in the process.

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